Going in Grace

Welcome to Going in Grace, a podcast where we go beyond simply understanding God's word. We explore how to live it out daily, making a meaningful impact in our lives and the lives of those around us. Let's tune in to this week's episode.

Let's tackle a real, but often unspoken struggle, living a double life. Many Christians desire righteousness, yet find themselves pretending wearing a mask of holiness while privately wrestling with sin, doubt, or brokenness. Today, we'll explore how this happens, why it's dangerous, and what the word of God teaches us about living truthfully. Even when the truth reveals, we're imperfect. If you've ever struggled with hiding parts of yourself, this episode is for you.

How does someone end up living a double life? Nobody sets out to be hypocritical. Most people want to be consistent, but pressures, whether internal or external, often push us toward pretense. Here are some common reasons why we pretend. First, we have a fear of judgment. We fear how others will see us if they know our struggles. So we hide behind a false image. Proverbs 29:25 warns, the fear of man brings a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord shall be safe.

We also desire acceptance. We crave belonging, leading us to adapt to what we think others want rather than standing in authenticity. Galatians 1:10 reminds us, For do I now persuade men or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bond servant of Christ. We're seeing here clearly that Paul is telling us, if you want to serve God, you have to care more about what he thinks than what man thinks. And then third, there's unresolved sin. When we allow sin to linger, instead of confessing and seeking transformation, we compartmentalize our lives. 1 John 1:8-9 declares, if we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

The problem with living a double life is that it leads to deception, of self and others. When our outward life contradicts our inward reality, several consequences follow. Spiritual decline. We drift further from God because pretense blocks intimacy. Think about it. How can you be in a loving and committed relationship with someone who is pretending to be a different person? Wouldn't you want to see the real them? Love them for who they are and be there for them as they mature instead of investing in a fake? Isaiah 29:13 says, therefore the Lord said, inasmuch as these people draw near with their mouths and honor me with their lips, but have removed their hearts from me. And their fear toward me is taught by the commandment of men. God wants us to be real. He wants our hearts. And when we are not giving him that, we are going down spiritually.

We have emotional burdens. We want to keep up appearances and that is exhausting. It can lead to anxiety and shame. Leading a double life can cause mental illness. We have to consider what it does to us to be one person at home and another person among our coworkers, our friends, and those in our community. It takes a lot of energy to keep up with a lie. And it makes the prospect of the truth become more and more frightening as we build a larger storm. Then there's the loss of our testimony. When the truth surfaces, because it will, it can damage trust and credibility. Jesus warns in Luke 12:2, for there is nothing covered that will not be revealed nor hidden that will not be known. There will always be judgy people in the world. Our bigger concern should be staying in truth with ourselves and with God.

I want you to pause and I want you to think about some of the major scandals that we have seen as of late in major news media streams. Think about all of the damages and consequences to families to corporations, to communities, to the body of Christ. It's important that we remember that our lives are not just our own. We are deeply connected to other people and people are watching us. They're even following us, whether we know it or not. So consider that the solution is not to try and be perfect, but it is to be honest. The Bible calls us to walk in truth, even as we acknowledge that we need grace.

Instead of hiding, we should bring struggles to God and trustworthy believers. Note I said, trustworthy believers. You can't tell your business to everybody. Confession and transparency work wonders for the soul. James 5:16 instructs, confess your trespasses to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed. The effective fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. Let's seek transformation, not just maintaining a good image. Our goal should not be a spotless reputation, but a pure heart towards our God. Romans 12:2 reminds us, do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. We should depend on God's strength. Living an authentic life is not about depending on ourselves. It's about God's grace sustaining us. Second Corinthians 12:9B, that means the middle of the verse, reassures us, my grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness.

If you found yourself torn between public holiness and private struggle, let me remind you, God doesn't call us to perform. He calls us to be transformed. Care less about the thoughts and the opinions of people and stay close and connected with God. You are not meant to live in deception. His grace meets you where you are and leads you forward. Let's commit to living truthfully, not because we are flawless, but because Jesus makes us whole. Also remember, this walk with God is first and foremost about your relationship with Him. Be real, be authentic, and go on your journey, a personal one, with Him, unaffected and unmoved by the thoughts and opinions of others, especially if their thoughts and opinions are for you to live a double life. If this episode spoke to you, share it with a friend and I'll see you next time. You've been listening to Going and Grace. Be sure to visit us online at brandistover.com.